So #1 son traded the 66 mustang we rebuilt together for a lifted up built 96 T-100 about 2 months ago (this I have no issue with at all). Now he has decided that having 2 big trucks is not the most brilliant idea for a starving college student so he is attempting to sell/trade the T-100 and get a car to improve his mileage and overall bottom line.

So far so good, right?

Well yesterday he gets a call and some guy wants to trade him for a car - we look up the values etc and for sure we will be coming away with the better end of the deal but not by a whole lot. I offer to ride along to make sure everything is all good with the deal. The other guy is from WY so we are meeting on the north side of town in Thornton. We arrive and they are already there, Two 19yr olds with flat brim hats from WY - (first sign). Anyway, time is spent going over both rides and keys swapped for a test drive. We drive their car and decide if they like the truck to make the trade. We get back first and wait.... and wait..... (2nd sign). Finally we see them coming down the street. They stop out of view (opposite side of the gas station on the corner) at a traffic light then they turn the corner and we see them once again. They pull into the lot - jump out of the truck and say - no way, not taking the deal, cant do it and split - like likity split, like rushing now... (3rd sign) We say no problem, thanks for coming down and they are gone. We had noticed the truck making some odd noises when they pulled in but did not think much of it - (4th sign) it is a heavily modified truck after all and has always made lots of creaks and moans as the suspension flexes.

As we are walking around the truck to get in and head home we notice it... the rear passenger leaf spring is broken, the shackle is folded up against the frame... WTF!!????

I have to settle #1 son down as he is about to take off across the lot to pull the flat brims out the drivers window and "set them straight". I say to him, to just let it go, we can fix this easy enough, not worth it and you have his contact info so if you wish we can press charges. I start to go through the tool box to see what kind of band-aids we have so we can limp home and I hear a sweet young woman's voice say "we saw the whole thing and have their licence plate #" I turn around and there is a car pulled next to me and the driver is a 20 something young lady with a young man wearing dregs in the passenger seat, 2 empty car seats in the back. She explains to me that they witnessed a dark green or blue dodge stratus rear end the truck at the corner RIGHT THERE!!!! And take off, they followed it and took down the plates, then returned here to pass that info on to us. (this part actually does quite a lot to reaffirm my confidence in today's youth - there is hope). She passes this info on to us, I thank her over and over again and tell #1 son to give the local cops a call.

He does this and tries once again to call the flat brims to come back - explains that we know what happened, have the plates and the cops are on their way, that they aught to come back and face the music because the cops will be passing out tickets to all those who left the scene of an accident. They do not answer but call back after checking the message and say they are on their way back. Cops show up before the flat brims and I tell them that if the kids are truly behaving like they know they f'kd up then we do not want to have them ticked if that is ok with the authorities. They say that is cool.

Flat brims show up, are truly sorry and even offer to fill our fuel tanks for the trouble. I explain to them that accidents happen, you have to take responsibility and own them, karma is a real bitch. Cops explain that they are going to try to find the actual driver of the run off car but if they are not able to - or they do not have insurance, #1 son can legally go after their insurance for the damages and that we are being really cool because we have asked that they not be cited for leaving the scene.

So here is the thing, there were at least 3 parties (2 flat brims and at least the driver of the other car) and not one thought to do the right thing and stop, make sure everyone is alright and call the authorities, or tell the owner of the truck that it had been involved in the accident. There is an alarming lack of personal responsibility these days. Now at least the flat brims did return when they found out the cops would be hunting them down anyway. #1 son fully intends to have someones insurance pay for the damages to the truck, either theirs or the actual idiot who did not see the giant lifted up blue truck at the stop light in front of them.

Lesson learned, always accompany the potential buyer when they take your car for a test drive, as it turns out the flat brims had been "testing the suspension" by flexing it on a loading dock nearby which is why their test drive took so long in the first place. They confessed this to the cops while they were being interviewed.

There are good youth and bad youth just like there are good adults and bad adults. It's not so much what's wrong with the youth these days as what's wrong with people these days. Last week a guy in his early 40's I'd guess blew a stop sign by our house and t-boned a car. This rolled the car several times into a street-light and knocked said street light over. Guy in the truck took off not caring about the damage done or that he could have very well killed the other guy. Luckily neighbors heard this and took off after the truck and he was picked up not long after. In both stories you have examples of good folks and bad folks. You just have to hope the good outweighs the bad. In your story you had dumb youth (flat brims) and awesome youth, the folks that came and told you the accident had occurred and that they'd gotten the plate numbers.

Glad everyone was ok overall and that you got it sorted out!

Boy do I have a little story to tell, unfortunately not a good one, it'll wait until I get to something with a keyboard.

I know you didn't mention this as a possible contributing factor but.........


So, who thinks CO is in better shape since they made marijuana so prevelanct and acceptable ?

That's a story but sad to say it does not surprise me at all. My experience with bad kids is that they often have crappy parents, most kids are pretty good with a little guidance down the path. I had a kid chase me down while I was driving the UPS truck recently (10 blocks on foot ) to give me back my sunglasses I had dropped on his front step. Same day another kid backs out of a parking space and tags my rear bumper ( No damage to the UPS truck but his honda didn't look good ) I'm standing 10 feet away and he takes off and calls me an Asshole as he jets by. WTF? I call the cops because, as you said, Karma is a female dog. Long story short kid gets caught, kid lies to cops saying I hit him, cops don't believe him, kid has warrants and kid goes to jail. If he would have stopped and said. "I'm sorry man, I didn't see you there." That would have been the end of it for me and he would have avoided a trip to jail ( For a while anyway ).

Sadly, it seems there is strong evidence of the integrity of our youth is declining. And Jeremy, I believe you nailed it with the fault resting squarely on the shoulders of the parents. We all see it, even as young as toddlers, where their parents allow them to run amuck with little concern for the other kids. You reap what you sew - it's as simple as that. It's not easy or fun to keep our son in order, but we get countless comments on how well behaved he is.

I am sorry to hear about the damages to the Yota (and sorry to hear he's getting rid of a toy to buy something sensible, but that is indeed a sign of maturity). I hope it all works out soon so he can continue his quest for a "college kid car".

I agree, parents play a huge role. Kids need more . Every time I see a flat bill I want to smack the hat off their head and tell them how ridiculous they look..I am sure they think I look stupid too though. . But I guess a flat bill is better than those skinny jeans
Glad to know good prevailed in this case...

As for maryjane......
I am a newby to Colorado, and definitely did not move here to "puff the magic dragon". But I remember thinking when Colorado legalized it that every bum and leech on society will now run to Colorado, creating more of a burden on the state. I know that there are some very respected citizens that smoke it, but when I think of a pot smoker, there is a certain stereotype that comes to mind.
Either way, I am for legalizing it because I see many benefits it can bring. Jobs for farmers, tax for the state and government, saving lives (drug cartel and smuggling), and tons of money saved by not paying law enforcement to keep it off the street. I realize it is a health issue, just like tobacco or alcohol, but people will smoke it anyways, legal or not. Just my two cents.... Not trying to

So... the story.

Willem: Dad, can I borrow your truck to run up to the clinic to get my sports physical signed.

Me: Sure son, I know it's a long way to go and we need it done today.

Willem gets in my F150, which is parked in front of his Bronco, throws it in reverse because the neighbors car is parked in front of it and proceeds to ram his Bronco and snap off a piece of his bumper (poorly welded by someone besides me). Quickly throws it into drive and acts like he's going to take off down the road like nothing happened. I'm in the garage hearing all this happen, I turn around and walk out of the garage, flag him down and proceed to give him the WTH just happened talk.

Item's covered are; you are in MY truck so drive it like I need it, if you hit ANYTHING you stop immediately, confirm no one is hurt and 2nd inspect the damage, apologize to your father for not paying attention, etc. etc. If it was a 2nd party vehicle you need to take pics, contact person, and follow basic accident rules.

Now, my son is mostly a good kid, I'm harder on him than most I know. But he is inexperienced in the ways of this world when it comes to accidents, after all he has only been driving for 5 months. In a strange way I'm happy it was my truck and his bronco that had a small bumper clash, it gave me the opportunity to mentor him on how he should act.

I also firmly believe that kids are made up of their parents influences, their friends influences and the societies influences in which we live daily. It most certainly is the parents responsibility to teach and guide our children while they are our children.

BTW my tuck sustained no damage.

Well handled and said... I would like to buy you a  ...or soda if that is what you prefer. I have been nervous about raising a child in today's society. Reading comments like this and the other ones on this subject calms my nerves a little. Good to know that there are still respectful parents out there. 


Comments like these make me a little mad... the biggest problem with our society is the lack of parental guidance. When people who really should be parents because they actually care and worry about how to raise there kids are.decided not to our community and world sufferers. If you care and raise kids with love and discipline and a general set of rules they will be fine.. to many parents are scared to discipline kids and just be role models.. when the lowest economic class is your highest birth rate tou wonder why our crime is out of control, there is a general lack of respect, and just plain laziness oh and record hand outs from our government... WE NEED TO MAKE MORE BABIES !!!!!!

The original post was more of a chance for me to and not so much about one economic or social class vs another. I am glad it has evolved into this discussion though. I too was much like you Geologist, married for nearly 9 years before we decided to have kids (though we did marry very young so our first was born when we were 28 - he is now 19 and the subject in this post).

As a son - I was a bit of a terror, not afraid to try anything, the first one to jump, always trying to climb higher etc. I most certainly found myself in more than my share of scraps and tight places. Much of this is because I was the first of the "latch key kids" I knew. When I was 8 - my mom went to work and as a result my brother, sister and I were left on our own quite a lot. My parents were strict (surprising because they were also hippies) but when they were not home to watch or catch us - we ran amuck, only worried about it if we got caught by someone who might actually tell Dad and Mom.

All this formed who I became and as a parent I knew I would want to be very involved in my kids life. I knew I would coach, meet other parents, volunteer at school etc. - I wanted to be that parent where all their friends would come over rather than the one where mine left all the time. And so it was decided that my wife and I would sacrifice ourselves in order to give them that attention. My wife, a nurse, has always worked nights to minimize the need for daycare or sitters, much of those nights were weekends, and once again - I was home on the weekend. Once the boys started school she could do more week nights but still nights. I turned down much higher paying jobs to avoid travel. And I did coach - for the last 16 years I have coached one or both of their teams.

As they moved into adolescence we talked about cars - I have managed to share my interest and passion with them both and we decided that as they became teenagers we would find a project car, spend our time in the garage working on it for them and once they were old enough to drive, they would have "the coolest car in the parking lot". But more importantly - time spent with Dad in the garage, learning that it takes hard work to accomplish anything, attention to detail matters, how to work with your hands, diagnose and think through a problem, fix things, use tools... But most importantly - time spent with dad - talking as we work, I learn whats going on in their lives, who they hang out with, which kids might be trouble, which girls they have their eye on.... And I am able to influence their decisions without "laying down the law" as my dad did.

Neither of my sons is perfect, neither is a scholar, neither is a stud athlete, but I am proud of both. At 17 and 19 they are by far the most mature and responsible young men I know (and I know a bunch as I have coached for 16 years - right?). Now this is not saying that one or the other at times might make poor choices, but they will always own that mistake and accept whatever consequence might come from it. They are teenage boys after all. For the most part, their friends are also good young men.

The comment about "flat brims" was more of a description of the age of the kids involved. These kids were obviously "well to do" they were offering to trade a $10k BMW in excellent condition for that T100 (which is not in excellent condition). Mine have chosen a different style thankfully. They keep their pants at their waist, not below their ass and their hats (well most of them) have a proper curve.

I believe that to be a good parent, the most important thing is to be involved, spend time with them. Not just doing what you do - having them tag a long with you, but spend time with them doing what they do. When they are little, read to them, play cars or dolls with them. Play catch in the yard, goo to the pool and swim. Then take them fishing, camping and hiking. let them hand you wrenches in the garage. Keep a set of grubby clothes in there for them to wear too. Teach them that they do not have to worry about the dirt that watches off (a quote from a very old boy scout handbook). Sit down to dinner and eat with them, turn the damn TV off more than its on.

All this and perhaps 10,000 more things and you still might have tragedy strike your family, lose a child but at least you can be confident that you did what is right, and did your best to raise a responsible, loving, contributing member of society.

Yeah - I guess you can say there is something else I am passionate about.

Hockeydad...Your parenting is exactly what my wife and I plan to do and I have much admiration and respect for your sacrifices. After reading your post and Kinders, I feel more at ease raising my girl here. You have to remember, I grew up in a very small country mountain town. Moving here has been somewhat of a culture shock.

My wife and I married young too. We both turned 21 when we got married. We planned on having children a few years ago, but the economy hit us hard. I was working 40-50 hrs, but only turning wrenches about 20 of those hours. So my paycheck took a huge hit. My wife and I always agreed that we wanted to raise our children, not some babysitter. So we waited until I could get a job that could allow my wife to stay home and be a mom, and I was unsuccessful. So we agreed going back to school was the answer. The past few years have been tough. Going back to school when your 27 was not fun. It was like starting all over. Living on one small salary was not that bad because I am not real materialistic, but it took a hit on my pride having my wife support me the past 4 years. Yes, I worked all types of side jobs to help out (tree work, automotive repairs, cutting grass, etc), but it was still embarrassing that everyone knew my wife was working everyday while I was sitting in school. But it is paying off. I graduated last May and had many great 6 figure paying job offers, but they were all working on an oil rig as a mudlogger or geosteerer. So I would not be home months at a time. The money is not worth it. Family to me is worth more than money.

The job I took here in Denver allows my wife to stay home and be a mom, and allows me to be there every night and weekend. We wish our parents could be here so they could be grandparents, but they are retired and can visit us anytime.

I look forward to doing some camping and 4wheeling with you fellas. Maybe even having a

First off I like you green machine. Second congrats on your baby. Just had mt 4th two months ago :-) you will be a good dad you have a bronco put them on the right path and problems should be few and far between.. Everyone one I know with a bronco is a good parent;-) mine is under the knife right now....

This is off subject a little, but for those of you expecting your first, or if you just want a refresher, I have signed up with www.babycenter.com for a weekly email that gives me a 5 minute quick read on how the baby is growing and progressing. I signed up for this with our first, who is now over 3 years old. I still get the email for him, that states what things to be teaching him etc. Worth the time. I have again signed up for our new arrival in less than 3 months.